My 3 yr old daughter took this pic of me

Monday, May 13, 2013

Mother's Day - NOT What I Expected...

I am a pretty "low expectations" woman when it comes to holidays and birthdays etc. so when my husband brought home a gorgeous bouquet of flowers for me a couple of days early, I was so happy! They are so beautiful and I LOVE flowers!

My kids are Gameboy - 12, Wild Princess - almost 6, Little Flower - almost 3, and Baby Princess who is 7 weeks old so I was not expecting anything really elaborate for Mother's Day. I am a homeschooler and so it's not like my kids are going to "make something for mom at school" unless I plan it, which I did not feel like doing (a little busy lately with the newborn etc). I did go grocery shopping and made sure to bring home strawberries and my favorite chocolate, just in case someone felt like making chocolate covered strawberries for me - but didn't drop any hints.

It's been a BUSY few days and so I was not prepared at all this morning when I woke up. It was a morning of frantically running around, getting kids ready for church, packing a lunch to take to the inlaws, cutting my son's hair (WHY did I do this on Sunday morning??? beats me), showers, breakfast, packing diaper bags (yes, more than one - three, actually), and to top it off - we had an extra little one overnight last night.

When we left for church, it looked like a bomb had gone off in our house OR our home had been broken into and they couldn't find what they were looking for.

We arrived very late to church. Like 25 minutes late.

I forgot the mayonnaise I made this morning at home on the counter.

It is very difficult to manage a baby, a 1&1/2 yr old, and an almost 3 year old in a crowded building.

Our sweet Little Flower bawled and begged not to go on her visit with extended family after church (we don't have a choice - she had to go). Broke my heart into a million little pieces to drive away and leave my baby. On Mother's Day.

By the time we got to the inlaws, I was a MESS. First thing I did was bury my head in my hands and cry. This day was not feeling very special at all. I was overtired (from being up 4 times in the night) and it had been a chaotic morning. It was so busy, I didn't even have a chance to glance at the beautiful crafts my Wild Princess had made for me in Sunday school.

I was a little mad that on Mother's Day I had to be a mother and do the things that mothers do.

Sounds a little ridiculous, right?

After some good, adult conversation, I was able to take my mind off of me and focus on the people around me. It made total sense that I would have to be a mother on Mother's Day. Why did I think any differently?

My children's needs do not cease to exist just because it is Mother's Day. I had not told my kids or husband what I would like or what I expected on this day. 

I spent Mother's Day with two others who were also having a tough time with this holiday. My sweet friend lost her young mother a few years back and my other dear friend is going through some really tough situations and changes in her family and it's not easy. 

It's not easy to be a mother. If you want an easy life - don't be a mother. 

To be a mother you have to
  • let go of your expectations - often
  • learn to thrive and embrace your situation and your kids - no matter how difficult 
  • work work work and not always be appreciated in the way you would like or at all
  • seek beauty in the boring and mundane everyday things
  • voice your needs and desires (men & children are apparently incapable of mind-reading!! I know - shocking.)
  • Find ways to bring peace and joy into your life
  • Be incredibly patient
  • Seek God and ask for wisdom 

This is obviously the short list, but the important things that came to mind. I'm sure we can all add something here. 

By the end of today, I did manage to change my rotten attitude of "poor me, I'm so tired and hard-done-by" and started to appreciate my family. When we got home I had the kids do a 5 minute cleanup of the main rooms, then made myself some chocolate covered strawberries, and went for a walk on our beautiful acreage with my husband, Wild Princess, and Little Flower.

Do not let your expectations ruin your perfectly good day or your perfectly good life. It's really not so bad. More on this in my next post - Mrs. Jones.


1 comment:

  1. This is SO true! I spent a low key Mother's Day just grateful my husband would be home all day and I didn't have to parent alone. Quiet times, when someone isn't yelling because they're mad, yelling because they want something, or yelling because they're doing something fun are the times I'm able to look around and inward and really be grateful for all of my blessings...especially my 'little blessings'. :)